I'm gay and a West Ham fan – this is how football has changed for people like me

Growing up in the East End, we had a strong sense of belonging – to our club and our community. I never chose my club; the club was already a huge part of my family. 

My earliest memory as a West Ham fan is the joy as a kid heading to the cup final, with my dad and my brother along the A406, flag and scarf hanging out the window with other claret and blue coloured ribbons on West Ham fans’ cars heading to Wembley. I knew then, that was my tribe.   

I was never apologetically queer, I never hid my sexuality and that threw me into an unexpected path than what myself or my family had envisaged. Being an out gay woman meant that I suddenly became very aware that I wasn’t welcome in many circles and that included, at the time, being part of West Ham. I never fell out of love with my clu,b but I no longer belonged.  

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I was never physically attacked at or near our ground, yet I had been attacked coming out of a gay bar and that really did have an effect on me. I had experienced micro aggressions and of course hate language at matches, yet they weren’t recognised, there wasn’t terminology for such things back in the day. 

Ten years has flown by and the work from our founding committee Jim Dolan, Alastair Holmes among many others including Trevor Wood MBE (who sadly passed in 2024) helped to lay foundations for Pride of Irons.  

We now provide awareness and education briefings at women’s and men’s games for supporter liaison officers and stewards at both grounds.  

We work closely with other groups. Being a representative on the club’s Fan Advisory Board helps to give a voice to the LGBTQ+ fan base. 

Yes, the landscape in football has shifted. Clubs have played an important part in helping to create an inclusive environment for their LGBTQ+ fans. Campaigns such as Football v Homophobia and Rainbow Laces have been vital in helping to raise awareness. 

Yet, despite these positive changes, there has been a rise in reported homophobic incidents, not only in men’s football but also in women’s and grassroots football. 

Reporting systems are imperative to ensure LGBTQ+ fans and other communities feel safe, knowing that the club has their back. Pride of Irons believe in giving fans second chances, rather than excluding them for chants, as they may not realise the impact of their words.

The Kick It Out rehabilitation project, which includes awareness and education sessions, involves a committee member from Pride of Irons sharing stories to explain how certain behaviours/language can affect not only one individual but also family and friends. 

I’ve been asked many times recently on our goals for the future – our objective is to no longer exist because when that day comes, our job as a volunteer supporters’ group will be complete. Unfortunately, that time has not yet come, we face many more challenges including our trans and non-binary fans feeling even more unsafe than they have in the past at football and other sporting events. 

So, we will take stock and celebrate our achievements but we also ensure we remain focused to set out actions for the challenges ahead. 

Jo Bailey is the chair of Pride of Irons, the official West Ham United LGBTQ+ inclusion supporters group.

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